Dear Subconscious, Thank you for your submissions over the years. However, your recent creations have become out of control. It is in your best interest to reign it back, or we may have to halt […]

Dear Subconscious, Thank you for your submissions over the years. However, your recent creations have become out of control. It is in your best interest to reign it back, or we may have to halt […]
And yet upon graduating college you insist on leaving that lumpy brown heap on the sidewalk, a little going away gift to your neighbors who never once flattened your tires as payback for the red […]
I can assure you that there is absolutely no evidence, scientific or otherwise, to support your theory that werewolves run wild within our Park boundaries
Hawaiian Pizza is responsible for the death of my dear Tutu!
You’re just as caring and attentive as my other exes X, Boomer, Silent, Greatest, and Lost.
Dear the Last Time I Carried You Back to Bed: I just realized it’s been six months since you’ve staggered into our room, crawled into our bed, snuggled up to our bodies, then needed to […]
Your love was great but not for me. Though, we had a lot of good moments, like banging in my sister’s place under a veil not to mention the moment with the stars.
Dear (212) 769-5722 — Thank you for applying to leave your group text! We were absolutely blown away by the applicant pool this year. We read through many submissions including, but not limited to: family […]
…and the narrow eyes of the poets glaze over at this point, for ‘unfortunately’ is a word we wear well.