This was at least 15 years ago. We had this guy redoing the kitchen, which took like 18 months because we’re morons. But anyway, the guy’s day job was, he’s a firefighter. Which means he […]
1. Liz’s brother mouthed a hot lightbulb long enough to get third-degree burns when he was six years old. The bulb, fixed in a desk lamp Liz’s brother had situated on the floor, glowed eerily, […]
Dear Katie, Why did you drop me off at this stupid camp. I’ve been here for a very long time. Maybe even half of my life. Please come rescue me. I told you I didn’t […]
He had heard that when you turn 30, you’ll be able to grasp what is water under the bridge in a way that you can’t in your twenties or teens. Well, today he’s 30 alright. […]
Antonio lifted his head from its resting place on the jacuzzi’s edge, turned to find his girlfriend Jordan on the other side of the tub looking down at her hands. “What’s all that?” Antonio started […]
There lies the land of bliss, I tell my son, as we walk down the hill, but sadly enough, we belong to the wrong side of the town. The land of the desperate is our […]
His dad told him to face his fears, so Kenny stalks the bees that zoom around his backyard, waiting for them to land. There’s something lurking there, but it’s not his dad. He moved away […]
He had to use the bathroom. Mom and Dad were in the backyard, so I let him in.
He scoops out a little bit of my brain, and tastes it.