Re: Timothée Chalamet Staring Off Into the Distance as Sufjan Stevens Plays Moody Indie Shit at the End of Call Me By Your Name [Or, In Which All the Actors Are Creeps or Straights Playing Gays in Idealized 80s Italy] (Reuben Gelley Newman)

Is it a video of myself // fucking like the old Romans did breathless

love transcending eras // goddamn Heraclitus can’t step in the same 

river twice but look here I am // a white man desiring a white body 

marbled pixels on a glass screen // a hunk a twink it’s all the same 

to me there’s Timothée Chalamet // Elio playing Bach’s Postillion aria 

he’s such a dick oh that’s how Liszt would’ve played it // oh Busoni

wah wah wah blah blah blah // Bach’s pure simplicity so damn gorgeous

Is it a video of myself do I dare // to eat a peach no jerk off with one 

both of them tried it the story goes // Luca Guadagnino directing 

skeptically taking a peach massaging it on his dick // it works

he told Timothée we shoot the scene // I know says Timothée

I tried it too like what the fuck // performative sexuality amirite

two straight men cast as the leads // Luca was able to look at me 

and completely undress me // says Armie Hammer in Out Magazine 

now he’s an abusive cannibal // can a man get any worse can he—

But who doesn’t love a twink // outlined by Bach’s figures or Ravel’s 

oceanic sweep constellations // consolations the grainy camera

Lombardian sun lingering Elio’s just a boy only seventeen // Oliver’s a man 

twenty four years old // what is the age where a boy becomes

a man is it a video of myself // a white man desiring a white boy 

desiring a white boy desiring // a white man I’m twenty three years old 

five years after the movie first // came out I saw it then and

Now I’m poised with the poem plump & perfect // biting into the peach Oh 

wait I haven’t even gotten into Sufjan // who’s here with me in the sheets 

of my ears teetering // the line between homosexuality & God

Sufjan who doesn’t come out publicly bc he deserves // a private life

but also bc the Christian girls won’t stream him if // he’s queer

openly yet I hear he lives with // his husband near me in Brooklyn I hear 

he walks his dog in Prospect Park oh yes I’m a fangirl yes // I’m an idiot 

yes I long for the music yes it twists its sour // into my ears


Reuben Gelley Newman (he/him) is a writer and musician based in Brooklyn. His poems are available or forthcoming in diodeThe Fairy Tale Review, The Journal, Variant LitAlien Magazine, and elsewhere. He has received support from Brooklyn Poets and Swarthmore College, and he was an intern at Copper Canyon Press. A Content Editor at The Adroit Journal and a Co-Editor at Couplet Poetry, he tweets @joustingsnail.


image: Claire C. Wood, Fine Ass Officianado.